I love the new Kia Carnival and I hate myself for it
What is wrong with you…
I have been asking myself the same thing.
I have long held the view that MPVs are the reserve of Catholics and parents who have lost the will to live. And yet, here I am, somewhat ashamedly, announcing my love for Kia’s latest “grand utility vehicle” (their words, not mine).
You have officially lost the plot.
I think so, too.
Traditionally, people movers have been bought out of necessity, not desire.
Just to clarify, I have no need for a people mover. I am single. I have no children. And despite my earlier comment, I still love life.
Nevertheless, I want a Kia Carnival. And no, this is not a paid advertisement.
Humour me. What exactly do you like about it?
I think it looks fantastic.
Kia describes it as having an “athletic shape”; a statement that reeks of new-age body positivity.
No, it’s not athletic. Not in the slightest.
What it is, however, is eight classy seats of pure goodness.
Classy? A Kia? Tell him he’s dreamin’.
You better believe it.
It is still unmistakably an MPV, though, Kia’s latest design refresh imbues the Carnival with a newfound presence.
The Tiger nose grille is wonderfully aggressive, as are the narrow LED headlights. For the fourth generation Carnival, Kia also moved the A-pillar backwards to create a longer, more SUV-like hood. The more commanding appearance carries through the rest of the design, with the rear hosting an all-new light bar that mimics the geometric design of the headlamps.
The end result is a car that is infinitely more desirable than the car it replaces.
That was some top-level PR bullsh*t if I ever heard it.
Essentially, I think it looks grouse.
And the appeal doesn’t stop there.
It’s a Kia. How good can it be?
Pretty good. The days of the take-me-out-my-misery Spectra and Pregio are over. Kia is now a genuine player in the automotive space.
The Carnival starts at AUD$46,880 (before on-road costs) for the base S model and climbs to AUD$$66,680 (before on-roads) for the fully loaded Platinum. I am under no illusion that that is expensive. Though the level of kit on offer just about justifies the cost.
All Carnivals come with a 4.2″ Colour TFT Supervision instrument cluster in addition to a Mercedes-aping 12.3” side-mounted touchscreen (though the latter is only 8” on the S grade model). Wireless Apple CarPlay is standard (FYI Ferrari charge in excess of $7000 for the same privilege).
Audio is also fantastic, starting with a 6 speaker sound system (4 Speakers, 2 Tweeters; S model) growing to a 12 Speaker BOSE® premium sound system (8 speakers, 2 tweeters, centre speaker and subwoofer) in the Platinum model.
Then there are the optional “VIP Lounge” seats. If you tick the right boxes – and you should – you’ll end up with proper Gold-class-cinema-spec recliners in the second row. Brilliant.
Throw in Kia’s cracking 7-year unlimited-kilometre warranty and capped price servicing and it looks like cracking value. Even at around seventy grand.
I’d rather have a second-hand, 412kW, F10-series BMW M5 for seventy grand.
You are impossible.
I doubt the person attracted to a Carnival cares about BMW’s M5.
Hang on a moment, skippy. Didn’t you say you wanted one?
Err, yes.
How about we talk performance?
Go on, then.
All models are available with either a 3.5-litre petrol V6 (216kW, 355Nm) or a 2.2-litre diesel in-line 4 (148kW, 440Nm).
*Guffaw*
I’ll admit, I’m clutching at straws here.
You’re telling me.
What can I say, the heart wants what it wants.
Cough twice if Kia is holding you hostage.
Oh for Pete’s sake…
Look me in the eye and tell me you’d rather have a Carnival over a Volvo XC90.
Answer me this: can an XC90 seat 8 people comfortably? Does it have a best-in-class luggage capacity of 1,139 litres with all seats up (or 2,461L with the 3rd row folded)? How about a seven-year, unlimited-kilometre warranty? I think not.
And besides, the Volvo starts at an eye-watering $85,000 (before on-road costs). That’s an exorbitant amount.
I value my dignity. I’ll take the Volvo.
Badge snob.